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How to be happy again? It's been so long I forget what happy feels like.

92 Answers
Last Updated: 05/03/2021 at 1:24pm
How to be happy again? It's been so long I forget what happy feels like.
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Jill Kapil, PsyD

Psychologist

I have over 9 years of clinical experience, specialize in anxiety, and am passionate about my work. My approach is collaborative, empathic, supportive, and goal-oriented.

Top Rated Answers
ZaraSmiles
September 24th, 2015 8:32pm
Sometimes, we're so lost in the rain that we've forgotten what the sunshine looks like. But, no matter what, the sun will always shine again. It can be so so hard to hold onto the hope that happiness is within your reach, but nothing is won without a struggle. We're here to support you through this and I know you can smile again.
Compassionateandcaring22
March 4th, 2016 9:21am
The reason why there is so little happiness in the world is dependency. Happiness is not dependent on 'anything' or 'anyone' or found 'anywhere'. We keep delaying our happiness until things are just right in our life. We think we will be happy in the future and then wonder why we are not happy now. Happiness is only possible when we are able to accept everyone as they are, at every moment, in every situation. That means an end to judging or resisting others, an end to complaining and blaming, an end to criticizing and controlling and an end to competing with anyone
Teasley4031
February 11th, 2015 6:32pm
The short answer to this question is, yes, you will feel happy again. I know what it's like to be so much in the dark that you don't even remember what happy looks or feels like. It could be right in front of you and you'd have no idea. I know what it's like to feel so down that it looks as if there is no way things are ever going to look up again. But, the good news is that those feelings, are not realistic. Now don't get me wrong, they're real feelings, but it's just your depression (or whatever else you might suffer from) talking. It wants you to think that there's no way out, that you'll always feel this way, that you have no hope, but it's a lie! I have found that when I'm in my "dark place" in order to get out I need to start noticing the little things around me that put a smile on my face. They can be the smallest things like a simple funny picture scrolling across your news feed, or a friend sending a simple "hello, how are you" text message, or your loved one calling you up. Start a journal and every day list ONE thing you're thankful for that day, list one thing you're proud of accomplishing that day (even if it's something as simple as "I got out of bed" or "I ate today" or "I did a load of laundry") it doesn't matter, be proud of what you've done-because I know, it can be challenging to do anything when you feel like all is lost. Once you're able to start noticing the little things in life, start looking ahead and what you want your life to look like....even if it's for just the next week or hey, even just the next day, set goals. I promise, things will start looking better....and I know you've probably heard that a million times and you might not even believe it....but sometimes-just knowing that other people believe in your is enough to give you that little nudge back toward the light. Stay strong
Anonymous
February 12th, 2016 9:31pm
You're killing yourself with all this negative energy. That's why you claim to be "dead" in a sense though you still feel physically alive. I feel what you feel sometimes, but then again you wouldn't be given so many problems if there weren't as many solutions open for you. The first thing you should do is look in a mirror again and try telling yourself, "I want to die." If you really thought you had no more good in this world, you'd find it in yourself to say it. But otherwise, if you had any ounce of hope left in you, you would not be able to tell yourself such. I couldn't bring about me to say it. You have given a lot of insight on things you have gotten and let go in this world. Have you ever tried muttering the words "thank you" to those things? Have you ever tried being grateful for the way you are? About how you're aware of your sadness and about how you want so much to be normal again? Have you ever been grateful to your love for keeping you company? A lot of people fail to see the blessing in the things that oppress them. You suffer to appreciate things more, I'd always say. Don't shame yourself; be thankful you still have you. Another key to overcoming your situation is embracing it, not thinking ill of it. The more you think something's bad, the more it will aggravate you. Force yourself to laugh at the bad things in your life. Let your thoughts fly, and laugh at them as well. Maintain mental poise, keep yourself positive, and if you can... pray. Dude, I must also tell you that depression in your case can lead to chronic diseases. You wouldn't want that to happen to you now, would you? And don't worry about getting back to normal. You already are; your mind just refuses to accept it and diverts your attention to something else. Remember to always stand up and look to the sun of optimism, not to the ground of your problems. Good luck to you
pearl108
April 24th, 2016 2:54am
As lord Buddha says, if you say " I Want Happiness" , all you have to do is remove 'I' which is ego and 'want' which is desire and all you are left with is 'happiness' ". Being selfless and working without desiring anything in return is the greatest happiness you can attain. :)
DestinedForGreatness
September 28th, 2015 5:06pm
I used to ask my self that question all the time until I subconsciously started smiling at the smallest of things. You will get there
ahannahi96
February 17th, 2016 12:39pm
Try to remember the things that made you happy in the first place. Hobbies, for instance. Get your passion back and start it up again! The feeling you get when you do something you once loved again is beyond happy!
Leo18
February 12th, 2016 8:38pm
This is something that almost everybody goes through at least once in their life. Just know that it's okay. It's okay to feel down. Because tears teach you a lot more than smiles ever will. What matters however, is that you don't stay there forever. Darkness lets you shine,a lot brighter than before. So the best we can do is to look at it as an opportunity for growth. And if you want to be happy...Try to realize that happiness is not a place to visit, it is rather a matter of choice. It is YOUR CHOICE.
Monica123
February 26th, 2016 3:41pm
Happiness comes from within sweetheart. There is no one who can make you as much happy as you can make yourself. Do things you love. Go out. Live. Travel. Explore. Wonder. Wander.Anything and everything. Get a makeover or try different kinds of food or get piercings or a tattoo. Do whatever you want to do. Happiness will prevail :*
Anonymous
February 21st, 2016 10:46pm
If you chase happiness you'll never find it. Deal with the emotions you're experiencing right now. Don't neglect them by chasing a more pleasant one. Accept any sadness as temporary, you will get through it.
CosmicStranger
February 20th, 2016 8:06am
Happiness is actually all around us, the only problem is that we don't seem to distinguish happiness because we all know that there are certain things called for everything and that it's so easy to know what makes us unhappy than to consider that we are happy.. My tip for you is to read good captivating books, poems, listen to music you like (either the the lyrics or simply the music itself), talk to people both in the real world and cyber, watch slam poetry, cartoons if possible, do art, take care of yourself and never doubt
ashmiblue
January 18th, 2016 9:21am
When was the last time you made soap bubbles or played with a baloon? Seek happiness in little things. Big definitions are always disasters.
Anonymous
February 27th, 2016 10:35pm
Happiness can be found when you love yourself and to be happy again , you have to love yourself again. Think about what is making you unhappy and try to fix it , if you cannot fix it just let if go and start anew.
Anonymous
April 10th, 2018 9:56am
First of all, realize that your happiness depends only on you and not on people and circumstances. Too often we believe that our friends and family or better circumstances will make us happy, the problem with that kind of thinking is that we take power away from ourselves and if there is even a slight change in our lives, we go back to being unhappy. Now since you yourself are responsible for your own happiness, you have to find ways to become a person that makes you happy. Find and do things you love, hang out with people you like, I know that might seem really hard at times but things will slowly get better. Spend time, care and effort on yourself, treat yourself like you would a loved one.
Anonymous
March 2nd, 2016 5:13pm
It sounds like you may have depression, which can be hard. I'm sending a big virtual hug to you and everyone else that feels this way. Find things that you enjoy, also you may consider finding a therapist or counselor to talk to about this
Keola
March 10th, 2016 3:55am
Happiness comes from within yourself. You have to work on yourself in a positive way in order to achieve that happy feeling. Increase your endorphins and go out there and be physical, it could be in the form of exercise or just as simple as getting off the bed or couch and moving, walking, taking in some sunshine. Another this is to look at yourself in a positive way, do something special for yourself, buy a book if you are a reader, get a massage, get a new haircut or new hairstyle, or buy something new for yourself. You can be happy again by letting go of negativity and bringing in positivity.
Anonymous
February 17th, 2016 5:18am
Just do you and do what makes you feel happy im sure you can find yourself again i believe in you 100 %.
ComeDreamWithMe
July 13th, 2015 5:11pm
Nothing in life lasts forever. Sometimes, a troubled period in life can go on for years and start to feel like it will never end. But no matter how long unhappiness lasts, the sun inevitably breaks through the clouds. But, you can't always expect it to happen on its own. It's important to remember that you are the master of your own happiness. It's something that must be sought, not waited to be happened upon.
Anonymous
February 26th, 2016 9:35am
Sometimes it takes a while to feel 100% happy. Never give up. Make positive changes in your life each day. Take it one step at a time and you will reach your happiness.
Anonymous
April 17th, 2016 4:20am
Think of happiness as a million dollars in your future bank account where now you have only a dollar. Give a lot of things a try. Help others. Do something for someone you've always wanted. Slowly, gather small amounts of happiness. Soon you'll have your million dollars. Quickest way would be to spread happiness. Yours will ricochet back at you along with other people's happiness.
amazingkay
March 19th, 2016 11:16pm
Find what you love and hold on to it, and don't let other people take it away. No matter what other people do or say, always hold on to that one thing that keeps you motivated, energetic, and helps you get through the day.
Anonymous
February 19th, 2016 3:25pm
Life's like a long dark tunnel. Most people have good light sources, like a bunch of flashlights. And some of us have just a candle. But just no matter what there's always light. You just have to look for it. Your flashlight is waiting for you.
Honeyrose
February 26th, 2016 9:46pm
A question I used to ask myself a lot. Then I realised that happiness is an inside job, you are in control of how you feel, you are in control of how you perceive a situation and the value you give it. Count the blessings in your life every day and be grateful for them. Chose happiness and happiness will find you.
MyGlassIsHalfFull
March 20th, 2016 1:46pm
Focus on yourself remember that you are strong, beautiful and smart. Take time out for yourself, have a nice relaxing bath or even better have a cup of tea!
professionalJet53
March 10th, 2016 1:04am
I wish there was a magic bullet, but the only way I found so far is to try to be busy and get what little happiness I can find day to day. I try to set reachable goals for myself and work to reach them. It is somewhat effective.
rhea752
September 15th, 2015 11:50pm
Yes you will!!! "the rainbow only comes after the rain" - You have to go through some of the bad stuff to get through the good, and you will get there!!
HakunaMatata2k
February 21st, 2016 5:37am
I struggled with this a lot. Try your best to find something that actually makes you genuinely smile, that way you know what feeling happy is like again and you know what you need to do to attain happiness. It wont be easy though. Good luck! :)
Vivianabella
March 10th, 2016 1:41am
find something to do that makes you happy, but since you forgot what the sensation is like, try writing or something to express yourself with, there's a whole list of things you could try, I say the best way to feel happy is to genuinely laugh. Laughter is great :)
Anonymous
May 12th, 2015 4:02pm
Yes. Everyone will feel happy and unhappy at some point in their life. Change in lifestyle, meeting new people, starting a new job could all contribute.
DipityEnigma
July 14th, 2015 10:38pm
You sure will! One day someone or something will make you happy. As they say though "look for the bad and you will find it" meaning that there's always something negative about people, a situation, a place etc but it's about what you're willing to put up with and what you're willing to see. If you see the bad in someone or something, you need to be able to search for the good too. We all have our flaws, no one is perfect.